It is strange that even although you are in a room full of people that you can feel totally alone, you can also feel like that when you are sitting working away on something and your phone beeps letting you know that you have a message and your heart then skips a beat thinking that you are hearing from a loved one, but instead it is only telling you that you have an email from some obscure sender trying to sell you something or other. I know that feeling well, the one where you think "Oh maybe it is....." but recently it has not been :(
I had a long chat with him the other night and cleared the air in regards to how I have been feeling recently. I do not think that we have finished talking, I have so much that I want to say, but at times I cannot articulate what is going on in my head into a normal conversation, it just seems to come out like "Blah blah blah, snort, cry snort, blahhhhh!" God I sound like I should be seeing a psychiatrist, but I am fine, just lots of feelings and emotions rushing around in my head because I have so much time on my hands at the minute. I will be fine once I am at work again and focused on helping others and not having to worry about me.